Every day I expect to wake up inspired and cleared of all my shit.
All the years of work and struggle will finally resolve to calm, confident clarity.
So I lather up the thoughtwork and go trolling for the magic bullet that will elevate this cranky brain to higher ground.
OOPS! Trying to spin new thoughts from the same level as the cranky thinking just turns into a tangle that adds more drama and confusion into the system.
So I need to go dowsing.
Get quiet and grounded.
Soft and spacious.
Feel for the subtle connection to Presence.
Create a gesture of invocation, offering, surrender through my whole body and let my bones feel that shift into alignment with Grace.
We are so disconnected from true Expression; our bodies socialized and constrained by our need to be accepted.
All the leaping and yelling and cartwheels squeezed into a tiny box and shoved into the back closet, almost forgotten.
Our bones and breath go searching for that lost ease and freedom.
We feel something is wrong; something missing so the brain goes looking for what needs to change.
And thinks it’s out there in the world.
So I get quiet and let my bones feel for Wonder, Magic, Miracles of delight and freedom.
There in the back of my heart in a dark quiet spot I find that goofy, vulnerable, cartwheeler.
And feel her back home in my bones.